Santa Claus - My Fake Diary

Friday, 30 January 2009

bak 2 sh-tty xmas twice again.

the sh-tty elves p-ssed on me i had 2 give em a shower n change their nappy. the machines wer experiencing a malfunction and also i read my good people and naughty people list. everyone on the good list was just me. i wrote myself down about 100,000 times. everyone else in the world got put on the naughty list and michael jackson nearly threw the baby down so hes in naughty list. i gave the spice girls just spicy presents. i gave this little kiddy 100 empty presents. they looked like a present was in there but nothing was in there i think he cried and i gave him a little barbie doll n his mum sent me an email saying:

To Stupid Pause,

What a stupid santa you r! ur meant to be doing ur job not giving children opposite sex toys and clothing. my nephew got a girls skirt saying 'I suck and I am gay' on the front with a hot pink girls background. You are the worse santa in the world! Mrs claus will give me a better present.

I love you from Fam

then mrs claus sent the lil boy just present shaped presents with nothing in them.

To Stupid Mrs.claus,

i kill u

I love u from Ham