Mitt Romney - My Fake Diary

Sunday, 14 June 2015

June 15, 2015

Dear Diary,

I was crushed emotionally today. It was worse than when I said I wouldn't run. That was really a ploy so that the other Republican contenders could knock themselves out. Then I'm going to drafted. I just have to keep it cool.

But while I waiting they yanked my secret service guard. That's a wake up call. Going out into public without Vito Oilo. He always was around. I could smell that pomade on his hair. He always had one hand hidden in his vest, unless he only had one hand.

Now he's gone. Who'll open the door for me? Who'll jump in front of me if some one shoots at me.

Maybe I should jump in the race now.