Mitt Romney - My Fake Diary

Tuesday, 28 August 2012

Today has not been a banner day, to say the least. Why did God have to throw a hurricane at me, just before my moment of glory at the convention? If I were on the other side I'd probably have to say it was an omen of some kind. Well, I'm not on the other side! If I used profanity I might very well utter 'WTF'??

Then there's the North Carolina polling numbers. The state is a toss-up now. I never would have thought the backwoods country would be anything but in my camp; but clearly I'm wrong about that. Maybe, God willing, and without a hurricane later, I can get NC back.

Then there's Paul Ryan. Don't get me started on him; what a piece of work. I could have sworn the other day, while we were campaigning together in some god-forsaken-hellhole, that he was going to kiss me. And I mean right on the lips! I know he's married and all but I just got that kind of creepy feeling. He is from Wisconsin after all; when I was growing up in Michigan, Dad always said watch out for all Wisconsinites. 'Don't trust' is what he would say as I ran out the door with my valet to get some games in down at the field.

Let's just hope tomorrow things turn around.

Previous Dates Next Dates

« Full list of Spoof Celebrity Diaries

Send to a friend

Tell your friends about The Spoof!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more