Mitt Romney - My Fake Diary

Wednesday, 15 August 2012

With the campaign in high gear now, I'm using up every waking minute of the day doing work. This is making Bain look like a summer bible class!

Let me give you an example, dear diary. As was in the news, Chris Christie is going to deliver the key note speech at the convention week after next. It was said that he was on his 'fourth revision' and that's because I objected to some of the stuff being written. To wit:
in version 1, he said that 'he was going to punch Joe Biden in the face.' I said 'no'--take that out. He did so. In the second revision, he wrote 'as goes New Jersey, so goes the U.S.'. Again, I objected. I agreed it was probably true but kiboshed it anyway.

As I said, I've been very busy, and I actually had to read his version 3 today while taking part in my morning constitutional. I got him on the cell while I was sitting on my 'throne' (as Ann calls it). It kind of went like this:
Me: "hello, hello there Chris? It's Mitt. Mitt Romney."
Chris: "Yes--hello Governor. What can I do for you?
Me: "Governor, I was just reading your revision three on the speech. I like it except the line about 'eating more'. You say everyone should 'eat more'. Not sure how that's germane."
Chris: "Well I really believe everyone should eat more, Governor Romney."
Me: "OK well Chris, the world sees you already as 'weight-challenged' as I think you know. I...I'd like to see that left out. I don't have an issues with your obesity, Chris, but please, stick to the theme. Oops--pardon me."
Chris: "Governor, you sound like you're in the toilet."
Me: "I am, Governor. You could hear that? Well, I'm too busy to let any minute go by without getting something constructive done. Anyway, thank you. Goodbye."

Waiting for that version 4 tomorrow.