Mitt Romney - My Fake Diary

Saturday, 11 August 2012

This has not been a banner day. Polls aren't looking that good. I'll say it again--the only pole I really care about is my own. Still, the fact that Fox 'news' came out today with their own poll showing me behind was, how shall I put it...disturbing. Annoying at best. I called up Roger Ailes...'WTF Roger??' but after I said it I realized I was actually leaving a message and not really talking to him. Marked the message as 'urgent' at the end but still he didn't call me back yet.

You know what...I really can't wait for football to start. Nothing better than sitting around the luxury booth with my team owner buddies and shooting the bull while they're all swilling the damn whiskey. Shot glass in one hand and cell phone in the other...yelling at their minions. I love minions! Between you and me, my diary, there is nothing so satisfying as yelling at my minions first thing in the morning. I swear it's better than coffee...though I can only guess at that, since I don't drink coffee.

Drinkers have a definite advantage in politics. If I could just have a drink, perhaps I could loosen up a little. Just a beer. Obama did it! Had a beer with some schmoe and got all kinds of face-time on all the major networks.