"Macho Man" Randy Savage - My Fake Diary

Thursday, 4 November 2010

Ooh, Yeah. The Macho Man is still pissed off after yesterday's news. The election is over and despite running my own write in campaign; I only got 3 measly little votes. The Macho Man did his part, went to the streets, talked to the people and promised action in Washington. None of this namby-pamby debate crap with The Macho Man. The Macho Man goes to a committee meeting and body slams anyone who disagrees, oooh, yeah. "How do you like that sack of potatoes, Mr. Suit and Tie?"

The Macho Man would have brought a whole new fashion sense to capital hill, oooh, yeah. No more restricting suit jacket and pleated wool pansy pants but clothing meant for action. Parachute pants, bandana and muscle tee-shirts all day long baby. Now that's the dress code for men who work and sweat, Macho men of action, The Macho Man Army, oooh, yeah. For more formal occasions; black parachute pants and tee-shirt without rips or tears in the fabric, maybe.

The Macho Man was ready to drop kick his opponents to the corners of the Washington squared circle. The Macho Man was ready to do his part for his country. The Macho man has washed and ironed all his bandanas, ready to come to Washington, but no. Three puny little votes. Jesse "The Drooping Body" Ventura did it, why can't The Macho Man?

Today, I'm gonna take my F-350 Duelie with the 12 inch lift kit and off-road tractor tires back to the streets, oooh, yeah. I'm gonna find those people I talked to all those weeks ago, and then the Macho Man is gonna pull out an extra large can of Whoop Ass, oooh, yeah. They are gonna remember The Macho Man's name. They're gonna write in The Macho Man on the ballot in 2012. The Macho Man will get to Washington baby. The Machi Army is coming, and it's a freight train, oooh, yeah. Get on board, step aside or get crushed by these 36 inch thighs on a dropping leg slam. I guarantee, it's gonna hurt a smidge.

Macho Man, out.