"Macho Man" Randy Savage - My Fake Diary

Wednesday, 1 April 2020

Dear Jake the Snake Roberts,

Oooh yeah can you dig it?!? I can't believe I write exactly how I talk! Yo Jake the Snake I am going to beat you in ring at Summer Slam. You put your snakes jaws on my arms and I bled I and I hurt and I cried and I crapped my pants. Good thing my tights were brown. But, I rested. But, I've recovered! And I'm ready to put you in your place. Dig it! You see the Macho Man doesn't forget. Now the Macho Man doesn't back down. You see this whole time I was planning and I was scheming but now it's time for your career here in the WWF....oops WWE, to be over. And everything I write becomes true. So you are going to have a drug problem, you are gonna ignore your children and you are going to crap your pants in public. You're going to develop irritable bowel syndrome Jake the Snake Roberts. You are going to share in my embarrASSment. I know myself and Miss Elizabeth are going to live a looooong time together happily married in Chattanoooga Tennessee! Oh yeah can YOU dig that?!?

Most Disrespectfully,

Macho Man Raaaaaaandy Savage

P.S. Oh yeah!!!!