Jesus - My Fake Diary

Wednesday, 21 October 2009

Dear diary

Well, would you Adam and Eve it.

It's turned really chilly these last couple of days, and I have found out from that nice Mr Lazarus that some bugger has made off with my cross for firewood.

I am so pissed off. That was my retirement fund, that was. I was hoping to break it down into splinters and sell it off at a quid apeace. Would have made a bloody fortune.

Up in smoke, now.

Oh well, can't cry over burnt wood, and all that. I'll have to think of another scam.

Now, where's that Holy Grail? I bet Mum's tidied it up again. Bloody woman can't be trusted.