Derek Acorah - My Fake Diary

Sunday, 22 December 2019

Well, just had my card from someone.

I don't know how it is, though. I am sensing a D.....Does anyone know David? A Deirdre? A Derek? Maybe it is not a D. It could be a B...Bernadette? Bartholemew? Yes, it could be a Bartholemew? It must be my old mate Bart Simpson, the cheeky young scamp, but he is only fictional, isn't he?

Sam, do you know Bart Simpson?

What do you mean Sam is fictional? He is standing right behind you. Do you sense you are being watched? Yes, that is Sam. Do you believe me now? Well do you, punk?