Angus D Teen - My Fake Diary

Monday, 11 January 2010

I thought yesterday about all of the new stuff that has happened to me this school year that I didn't mention.

1. I started shaving. Okay, it's only about once every two weeks, but it's a start.

2. I got to watch my first porno movie. Mom and Dad let me housesit the Johnson's place over Thanksgiving when they went out of town, and I found their stash of skin flicks. I didn't know they made porn about fat people. Yes, I did see my first porno, but it was sicko. I never knew that Mr. Johnson was a chubby chaser, but looking at Mrs. Johnson should have answered that question.

3. For Christmas, my parents made me give my Sunday School teacher a Christmas present (because she gave me a box of candy). I bought a cheap one dollar picture of Jesus and put it into a cheap Dollar Store frame. To make it funny, I signed the picture and told her that I got it autographed. It took her a second to figure that one out. Everybody laughed but her, and she called the minister in to rip me a new one. Doesn't Jesus have a sense of humor?