Written by Skoob1999
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Sunday, 31 October 2010

image for X-Factor's Aiden Grimshaw Tops Ten Most Wanted List
Not Exactly A Thriller. A Bit Shite Really.

A spokesman for the FBI, based in Quantico, Virginia, today told Skoob Entertainment News that Aiden Grimshaw, the pretty boy from Blackpool off the X-Factor has made the Bureau's Ten Most Wanted list, on the grounds that he shows every indication of developing into a full blown serial killer.

Aiden has been accused of murdering the John Lennon classic, 'Jealous Guy' and more recently of murdering Michael Jackson's 'Thriller' in a Halloween themed X-Factor spectacular.

With some dummies.

He also recently murdered 'Diamonds Are Forever' which, according to FBI guidelines, qualifies him as a fully fledged serial killer.

Agent Candice Starving of the FBI told SEN:

"It's regrettable, but this guy is clearly a danger to the public. He's just committed too many murders on the X-Factor. He's worse than that Brazilian dude. Had he just murdered 'Thriller' there's a possibility we'd have turned a blind eye, because nobody at Quantico ever liked Michael Jackson - we're all convinced the flake was one sick puppy. But murdering Shirley Bassey and John Lennon is a crime against humanity. We're not prepared to tolerate that. We will hunt Aiden Grimshaw down with the intensity with which the hunt for Osama Bin Laden has carried on apace."

Convicted serial killer Hannibal Lecture told SEN from his cell in Silence Of The Sheep County Correctional Facility:

"I loathe and despise that boy. Were it up to me, I would fry his liver with some fava beans and wash it down with a nice Chianti. Th Th Th Th Th Th Th!"

Aiden Grimshaw refused to comment, other than to intimate that he hasn't been caught in bed with Katie Waissel either.

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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