Written by Robert W. Armijo
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Thursday, 13 December 2007

image for Brokeback Mountain toy camping set recalled due to possible franks and beans choking hazard
Everybody, look! I told you they were not here just to watch after us

Hollywood, California - According to the FDA, small franks and beans accessory parts from the toy Cowboy action figure camping set can become detached and lodged in the throat, presenting a possible choking hazard.

The recall comes at a time when millions of other toys manufactured in China have been recalled due to the use of lead-based paint. Critics say the recall is purely political, though some impressionable children may engage in age inappropriate role-playing as a result.

"It's a double standard," said Milton Burger, a spokesman for a gender and sexual orientation equality group.

Millions of children are allowed to play with Barbie and her male companion Ken doll. So why cannot kids play with a Broakeback Mountain camping buddies set, asks Burger.

"Oh, let me venture a guess," said Burger. "Hummm, because they are both male and gay. You think."

The recall could have been avoided all together if the toy manufacturer would not have insisted on the toys coming with franks and beans accessory parts, according to the FDA.

"Unlike Barbie," said the FDA spokesman. "The Brokeback Mountain LEGO Cowboy action figure camping buddies set comes with detachable miniaturized simulated franks and beans plastic parts. Why?"

All of Barbie's domestic cooking accessory wares, including the popular bacon and eggs breakfast set, have no detachable parts that can be choked on, counters the FDA.

"Besides," said the spokesman for the FDA. "I prefer Barbie's bacon and eggs, even if they're simulated. Over any Cowboy's franks and beans any day."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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