Written by Skoob1999

Friday, 11 February 2011

image for Global Crisis - Thunderbirds On Red Alert
Thunderbirds Are GO!!!

The latest press release from Tracy Island appears to be a thinly disguised attempt to reassure the world's population, that no matter how disastrous things may appear to be getting around the globe, we can all relax, because International Rescue are on the case, and patriarch Jeff Tracy has put his fleet of Thunderbird machines on red alert, just in case.

Tracy, a marionette with an overlarge head, his five sons, with their oversized heads, Brains, with his absolutely massive head, along with their London agent, Lady Penelope Creighton-Ward (also with an outsized napper) have been protecting people in peril since the 1960s, with their multi-billion dollar high tech fleet of rescue vehicles, known as the Thunderbirds.

International Rescue are a mysterious organisation, not least because nobody can quite figure out how they are financed. Tracy Island has been hollowed out and converted into the world's leading space center, and nuclear deterrent, said to be armed with neutron bombs, as well as conventional nuclear warheads. (To keep the bad dictators in order.)

The rescue ships they use, such as Thunderbird 1 - a supersonic rapid response vehicle, Thunderbird 2 - a heavy duty VTOL (Vertical Take Off and Landing) aircraft with pods to put stuff like The Mole in, Thunderbird 3 - a space rocket, Thunderbird 4 - an underwater bulldozer that fits in a pod on Thunderbird 2 when required, and Thunderbird 5 - a space station, all of which must have cost a bloody fortune to build, especially in secret with only a handful of people doing the graft, and never sending anybody a bill for their services!

Despite all of which, International Rescue have continually refused to disclose how the operation has been financed, and have insisted that only the Tracy's and Brains were hands on with the project.

Which must have taken billions of man hours.

Many questions shroud the mysterious Tracy family, questions which once prompted former President George W Bush to demand to know who is pulling the strings. It's on record that ex-convict, safe cracker, and XXXL headed chauffeur, Aloysius Parker told the then President to: "Feck orf! An' keep yer bleedin' snout aht o fings that don't concern you. Mi' Lud. Innit."

In spite of the controversial and secretive nature of International Rescue, Jeff Tracy has assured the world that it's strictly business as usual for the gallant Thunderbirds, and that despite wars, natural disasters, widespread civil unrest, government spending cuts, escalating unemployment, financial meltdown and birds dropping out of the sky, International Rescue will strive to continue to provide a free and confidential service.

Even though it sustains an operating loss of several billion dollars (US) by the hour.

Hurrah for the Thunderbirds!

More as we get it.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Thunderbirds

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