Israel gas find 'more Zyklon-B than helium' says Hezbollah

Funny story written by queen mudder

Thursday, 30 December 2010

image for Israel gas find 'more Zyklon-B than helium' says Hezbollah
Enough methane down there to keep regional tensions at boiling point for the next 100 years

Israel - (UpStream, DownStream): "It's a poisoned chalice alright," is how the Hezbollah Carbon Trading Authority described the latest Leviathan gas find.

The Lebanese energy quango has condemned claims by descendants of World War II poison gas manufacturers to the huge methane field, saying it was 'nothing but a sic joke'.

The huge find in disputed Israeli/Lebanese territorial waters has also sparked a massive criminal investigation by the Tel Aviv Stock Exchange.

A surge of suspect share-price movements and company disclosures has been described as 'no laughing matter' by Israeli police investigating criminal insider trading.

The gas find straddles international waters originally belonging to Lebanon but sequestered by thieving landgrab Israelis during the Reagan/Bush1 years.

Geological surveys have indicated Leviathan is funnel-shaped, with only its tip extending to the Israeli part of the disputed marine territory.

The main body of the gas deposit lies in Lebanese sovereign waters whose borders, conveniently, Israel does not recognise.

The estimated $95 billion find has been referred to the UN's fraud division for adjudication.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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