London - (Prenup Mess): Their creations have wafted up the aisle on Chelsea Clinton, Barbara Bush, Jade Goody, Cheryl Cole, Katie Price and dozens of other slags.
Today Boobski & Trollope, voted the world's sluttiest in the matrimonial couture industry, bagged that all important order for next year: Kate Middleton's wedding dress.
And while the final design is a closely guarded secret a Spoof News sneaky preview can confirm the see-thru brushed nylon confection will be covered from head to toe with latest must-have accessory-after-the-fact: Svarovski crystal meth.
Kate's stick insect figure means plenty of strategic padding will be added to make her look vaguely female.
A pair of latex nipple concealers are included in the design in case the royal nuptials take place in consecrated ground - eg Westmonster Abbey.
Bridemaids' ensembles are still at the planning stage and their final cut will depend on the actual sluttiness of Kate's little maids of honor.
Five will get you six that Kate's sister - up-and-coming young slut Pippa Middleton - will also go topless.