Written by Jimarillo

Tuesday, 28 September 2010

Today, in the country's capital of Pyongyang, crowds of North Koreans gathered at the Rungrado stadium in anticipation of the arrival of a very special guest. However today was slightly different as the guest was not the usual General as today Korea was host to the Father of them all, his excellence and supreme leader General Simon Cowell.

The current leader of North Korea is in bad health and is rumoured to be in his last days so Cowell was called to host a competition to find the new leader of the unfree world. With him to resolve this pickle was annoying itv through and through smarm Piers Morgan and a girl whos beauty cannot seem to keep her luck in the black, the angel of the north east Miss Cheryl Cole (also known for her remarkable skill of being on the front of every magazine at one time).

As the local hopefuls arrived for the days audition the judges settled down to cast their wands of excellence on those who managed to please the gods of unessential celebrity. First through the rope was a small man from the edge of the capital, Jo Sung Park. With a rendition of Gene Kelley's singing in the rain he impressed the judges but under questioning he was found to have an affection for life and a need for travel and so was cast aside with three 'no's' from the judges.

With other geordie entertainment stalwarts Ant and Dec on hand to control proceedings, the day was going swimmingly with over 250,000 hopefuls queueing up for their chance. One not so fortunate was four year old Kim An Agi whose cute dog taming exercise ended in tragedy when the local caterers had a mix up at lunch.

The day ended with a flurry of decent candidates, none better than Anju resident Kim Jong Kim with his amazing and pointless street dance combo, South into North. They put on an electric show combining modern and classical dance moves backed by a Shakira and Bobby B mash up. Currently as favourites they got a resounding yes from all three judges and will be strong contenders for the crown of Korean Idol.

After an exhausting day of judging Morgan commented that with the display of talent he had witnessed today he is in wonder why we have not seen anything of the Korean people before. Shortly after his car had brake failure and crashed off a side of a mountain tragically killing the driver and just killing Morgan. Many sources have owned up to being behind the accident. Police continue to play cards as part of their investigation. He will be replaced on the show by stand in leprechaun who did something once, Louis Walsh.

Korea's got Talent will not be shown on any channel unless he says so and you will watch it,

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: North Korea

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