Europe Wonders: Which Head of State Will Marry Swedish Olympian Ivana Phuque

Funny story written by Throckmorton Turdblossom

Monday, 1 March 2010


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Can Ivana be a Queen, or just a First Lady?

The Winter Olympic Games of Vancouver have concluded and the athletes are all leaving the village and heading home to their countries. The biggest question on the minds of many Europeans, however, is "which head of state will marry Swedish Skater and international sex symbol Ivana Phuque?"

Said John Smythe-Smithee of London, "they're already making book on this. The Russian guys got his gymnast girl at his side. The son of the Romanian Leader used to have Nadia. The French President has his topless model. The American President has his Stepford Wife. We all want to know who is going to get Ivana Phuque!"

Ivana answered this question as well as she could to reporters when she said "Many of the world leaders offered to give me a hand at the airport, but I wasn't interested in sneaking into a closet for a little finger fucking. I've also seen the heads of some of these Heads of State, when I bowed down before them, and they are getting a little old and wrinkly and need Viagra."

"Maybe if any of them have any Prince sons who are young and handsome and virile... either that, or I'll just play the field for a while and see how much money that billionaire Tiger Woods has left after Elin divorces him."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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