A huge luxury yacht leased by the dastardly Dick Cheney, once a member of the notorious Bush gang, has been seen plying the waters of Glacier Bay National Park in Alaska.
Only a month before the sailing yacht belonging to Ruppert Murdoch was also cruising here, possibly with Sarah Palin and husband Todd as passengers.
What could this possible onslaught of far right conservative Americana be doing in our pristine waters? Several possibilities exist:
1.They have discovered oil in one of our largest National Parks. Cheney's boat was large enough to be hauling off a couple hundred barrels worth all by itself.
2.They are searching for a secret way into Canada for purposes of invading and subjugating it.
3.They are planning a major hunting massacre of any and all major animals they find there.
Locals immediately called upon the Rangers to remind them that their primary duty was the protection of the animals there. The Rangers, however, being well aware of Mr. Cheney's top gun reputation, were busy hiding themselves out of harm's way until they were gone.
Meanwhile, Canadians vigilantes who were not afraid of a little wild gun play amassed on the border in an effort to prevent them entering Canada. Their boldness impressed Homeland Security enough to offer them jobs protecting our southern borders, even though the Kanucks are legally aliens themselves.
Environmentalists with bazooka mounted kayaks attempted to do a Lusitania number on Cheney's boat, only to have Blackwater helicopters swoop out of the sky unexpectedly and shell them to Davy Jone's frigid locker. A couple were retrieved from the water and could be heard shrieking from CIA induced torture aboard the boat for several hours afterwards. No word was heard as to the fate of those captured, although it should be noted that for some time afterwards sea gulls were to be seen following the wake of the boat diving for morsels.
After the boats left, Forest Rangers have been offering psychological support to the animals traumatized by the experience.
