Written by Frankie The J

Tuesday, 28 July 2009

image for France Declares War on US...Immediately Surrenders...Requests US Aid to Rebuild Shattered Economy
New French national flag

France declared war upon the United States, Wednesday, surrendered unconditionally, and requested US financial aid to rebuild its devastated economy-all within ninety seconds. A humbled Sarkosky signed the instrument of surrender before United Nations Peace Observers at 0001:30, Wednesday morning.

"We ask the United States to treat with us, immediately," said French President Nicolas Sarkosky. "Our economy is devastated; the snail crop may not recover," he continued.

"Say please," said US President Barack Obama during a telephone call to the French President.

"Please," replied Sarkosky.

"I couldn't hear you, Nicky," Obama gloated.

US troops will stage a Victory Parade in Paris as soon as they can land a platoon of US Marines in the French capitol. "We were caught completely off guard and were not prepared for a parade," said Marine Lance Corporal Ron Paul VIII, the highest ranking non commissioned officer on duty at Quantico Wednesday morning.

This is the third time in less than a century that France has surrendered to a foreign power without firing a shot in anger. "Frenchmen all over the world are in shock," signed some Frog mime, from whom no one has ever heard.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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