Written by howy

Saturday, 4 July 2009

image for Chace Crawford Is Being Labeled a Super Genius
Loosers of divorce

Not only is Chace Crawford handsome and stunning but he is also being labeled a genius by some observers after showing signs of extreme intelligence by deciding to have three male children out of wedlock through the use of a surrogate mother.

Crawford who will be staring in a remake of the film footloose on March of 2010 by Paramount Pictures has said he wants to have three perfect boys with the use of surrogate mothers because he wants to out maneuver greedy lawyers and save himself an estimated 7 to 25 million dollars.

Chace Crawford says he will choose a woman from Europe who has the intelligence quota of Marilyn vos Savant. Marilyn vos Savant's intelligence quota is rated at 228 and is considered the highest in the world.

Rickey Martin is said to have saved an estimated $25m to $50m by using a surrogate mother to give birth to his twin boys.

After Michael Jackson lost $7m 500,000 dollars to Debbie Rowe in a divorce settlement he decided to use a surrogate mother for his third child nicknamed blanket. Jackson's quick and brilliant move saved him an estimated 7m to 10m in divorce payments.

The biggest Hollywood losers of divorce were named in Forbes magazine. Movie stars Harrison Ford and Kevin Costner and director Steven Spielberg have been named in Forbes magazine's top 10 most costly divorce settlements in Hollywood.

Spielberg, who divorced first wife Amy Irving in 1989 at a cost of $100 million, was only beaten to the top of the poll by basketball legend Michael Jordan and singer Neil Diamond, at numbers one and two respectively.

Forbes speculates Jordan's pending divorce from his wife of 18 years, Juanita Vanoy, will set the former NBA star back by more than $150 million--the cost of Diamond's failed 1969 marriage to Marcia Murphey.

Ford ranks at number four after having paid an estimated $85 million to first wife Melissa Mathison, while Costner's 1994 settlement with wife of 16 years Cindy Silva earned him fifth place at $46m.

Another jackass looser is Paul McCartney who was ordered by a judge to pay his estranged wife $48.6 million divorce settlement to end their four-year marriage.

Mel Gibson lost an estimated 450m during his divorce settlement.

$25m is the amount Ivana Trump wrestled from Donald Trump in their 1992 divorce settlement. Even though Ivana is not intelligent, she was fortunate to be defended by marriage laws that favor the corrupt legal profession.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Topics: Chace Crawford




Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
45 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more