Moustafa To Meet His Maker After Murdering Mistress Concludes Mufti

Funny story written by Wire Piddle

Thursday, 25 June 2009

image for Moustafa To Meet His Maker After Murdering Mistress Concludes Mufti

Cairo, Egypt - Egytion tycoon, real estate mogul Hisham Talaat Moustafa, has been ordered put to death for the murder of his mistress, Lebanese pop star Suzanne Tamim.

Evidence presented in the courtroom suggests that Mr. Moustafa hired a hit man, former police officer Muhsen el Sukkari, who followed the singer to her apartment where he stabbed her and slit her throat; an act of revenge, prosecution stated, as a result of the singer breaking off her relationship with Mr. Moustafa.

The final decree came after advice was given by Sheikh Ali Gomaa, Grand Mufti, reviewed the case and agreed with the courts decision. The grand mufti is the highest official religious of religious law. Although the grand mufti's views are not binding; the court has the final decision, they are viewed as a valuable source of insight in the practical application of Islamic law.

The following is an excerpt; the conclusion of that ruling.

"Mr. Moustafeur, it 'as bin learned, 'ired eur forma police offica ta murda 'is girlfriend; eur lass whoa 'ed gallock 'im for anotha. Although 'e denies such 'appenings, t' evidence is jannock convincin. 'e seems ta av bitten off mooar than 'e could chew, 'n jannock frankly 'e's naw up eur creyt wiyaa' eur paddle. 'e could av let sleepin dogs lie, bur asteead chose ta lead eur 'orse ta wattah wheear 'e couldn't mek it sup. As eur result o' dis debacle, 'e shall be sentenced ta deyth."

It should be noted that the distinct pattern of speaking and use of gratuitous cliches may betray the fact that the grand mufti may have spent some of his formative years in Yorkshire, England, where he worked as a cook in a kabob shop and also as a part-time carnival barker.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!





Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Subscribe…
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more