The World News has confirmed that the dead are systematically coming back to life. But that's not the kicker. Reports from all over the globe are confirming that they are not after brains at all but the legs of the living.
One doctor in New York found this out the hard way. "I was working in the morgue when all of a sudden the dead returned to life! I thought they were going to eat my brains but to my surprise they started humping my leg!"
After that fiasco the doctor stated that they were all very tired and needed a nap.
Emergency officials are reacting with lightening speed to get these leg humping corpses back in the ground. They state it will take a couple of weeks. So it is imperative everyone be careful when going outside.
The last thing you would want is some zombie juice all over your leg.