Written by Number 6

Friday, 6 February 2009

image for Last Baby-Boomer Drops Dead
Bye-bye Boomers

Washington DC-- The Baby Boom Generation is dead. Wally Brady, 52, died last night from cirrhosis of the liver. He was the only remaining person born between the years 1945 and 1962. The generation known for its excesses paid the ultimate price.

Most Baby Boomers died in their twenties or thirties. There were early warning signs that went unheeded by the Dumbest Generation. Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Keith Moon and Jerry Garcia were early omens the Baby Boomers would all meet an early grave.

Drug addiction, lung cancer, alcoholism and AIDS took a fearsome toll on the Boomers. Most Boomers looked like they were 80 by the time they turned 40. Too much of everything was simply too much. Cemeteries and crematoriums were running a brisk business by the turn of the century.

"Nobody will miss them, they were so selfish and stupid." said 23-year old Missy Spacey. "I'm glad to be a part of Generation Z. My boomer parents accidently iced themselves when I was a kid, the morons. My grandparents are still alive though, at least their generation had common sense. Our generation will be like the Greatest Generation. The Boomers sucked." she noted.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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