London - (Cosmic Mess): Brilliant, masterful and magnificent omens are predicted by Hellfire Club soothsayers for Tuesday's solar ingress into the sign of Leo.
Brilliant, except for global piss process terrists such as Madonna, Jennifer Lopez, Melanie Griffith, Martha Stewart, Helen Mirren and Kate Beckinsale - all of whom took Opus Dei's thirty pieces of silver to besmirch a modern day Mary Magdalene whose feast day is celebrated on 22 July.
Also on the global whoredom hit list are karma fatcats Bill Clinton, Sean Penn, Dustin Hoffman, Robert De Niro, Steve Martin, Joe Strummer, Laurence Fishburne, Antonio Banderas, Robert Redford, Ben Affleck, Mick Jagger, Billy Bob Thornton, Kevin Spacey, Martin Sheen, Robert Plant and a sinister bastard at British Gas HQ responsible for recent UK price hikes.
Mars trines Jupiter this Saturday night.
