The largest cruise ship in the world when launched, the Royal Caribbean cruise liner "Genesis", has been so named because the owners wisely realised that to call it "Motorhead" or "Alice Cooper" would have been extremely silly.
The main feature of this new ship will be a 'central park' with tropical grounds, trees and grass. There will even be park benches with small brass plates commemorating old blokes who collected train numbers, played ludo or were tragically killed by runaway tractors in the country side.
It is claimed that the ship will be one and a half times the length of the Canary Wharf main tower, although how they will be able to stand this boat it up on it's end to compare size when it's finished will possibly be the greatest engineering feat this country has ever endured.
However, P & O have decided to hit back with their own record-breaking maritime venture. Their spokesman, Commodore Pugwash (elevated since he starred in his own eponymous BBC television series, due in no uncertain terms to Roger the Cabin Boy with Seaman Staines) explained:
"We simply cannot have this Royal Caribbean lot stealing our thunder! Our new super-cruiseliner code-named 'Codename X', will be the size of two or even three Canary Wharf towers (possibly one of each), and will feature no less than 3 IMEX cinemas, a horse racing track the size of Aintree and a 49-storey, 6-star hotel. Oh. And a Burger King as well. It will also achieve supersonic speeds as it glides 5 metres above the surface of the ocean."
