OK. It happened again. Forget Obama and Hillary's ranting and raving for a few days. This time, the U.S. Congress isn't the target, but the conniving Governor of New York, the fighter of graft, corruption, and, in the present situation, especially, prostitution! What happen bro'? Which brings up the question, can we not trust our elected male officials to keep their shlongs securely zippered in their fancy-shmancy thousand-dollar suit pants?
Who was it this time? Well, Governor Eliot Spitzer, Democrat, and leader of the Empire State of New York for the past year, takes the bite, and, is now caught between his cock and a hard place. Seems that the silver-spooned born Yid, code-named Client 9, recently spent a nice evening in a Washington, D.C. hotel room with a prosty, costing anywhere between $1,000 and $5,500 an hour! Eliot went 2.5 hours, but his "menu" was still not availble as of today. Apparently, this ring of honeys in the international Emperors Club operated in Los Angeles, New York, Miami, and in other American cities and overseas, as well, in London and Paris, and, get this, with some money laundering thrown in.
Now, according to one-time Bubba confidant, Dick Morris (aka "Toe Sucker of Prosties"), and currently one of the millions of political a analysts out there, he belives the Spitzer thing is no more than your garden-variety political rutting, just as he, Dick, had seen in the flesh. You will recall, Dick once had the hots for Hillary, while "Billie Boy" Clinton's one-time election manager. Morris was caught on video in a D.C. hotel ready to do the deed. In this case, Dick preferred feet and toes...forget about pussy, tits, and ass! Men view that as money down the drain when a "hottie" is putting out quite a spread. Morris is only saddened that Spitzer probably chose the crotch, rather than "her probably-perfect toes."
The 48-year old governor, in a hastily-called news conference yesterday, admtted his transgressions with a very incredulous and devastated wife, Silda(a non-human name, borrowed from the world of chimps), at his side. During his, "I'm so sorry, boo-hoo," speech, his three daughters were conspicuously absent and were probably hiding out in disgrace and pissed off that they, too, are being kicked out of the Governor's mansion. How embarrassing!
The Harvard Law School-trained former New York State Attorney General for 8 years, before winning the governor's spot last year, was direct and honest. Addressing his constituency, he admitted that his "hump buddy 'Kristen,' his 'pretty, petite, brunette slut, 5 foot 5 inches, 105 pounds, gave me a nice 2.5 hour party to the tune of a prepaid $15,000 at a top-notch D.C. hotel. Look, Silda ain't worth a blowjob and I haven't had 20ish poon tang for a long-time. The stress of Governorship caused me to play with some nice snatch to ease my transition into office. That's all there is to it! I'm ashamed of nothing." Silda fumed and sounded like a chimp gone berserk.
"I had earlier talked with Bubba and he said, 'Dammit man, it's free, she's gotta be rightly glove-box tight, and she'll get your rocks off a bunch. You did say you had over 2 hours. Man, that's just when Billie boy starts a goin' Arkansas style!'"
"Remember when I got that chunky intern, Monica L, to try my cigar in the White House? I went ballistic!!! A hell of a lot better than a coffe break. Eliot, you'd be a fool to pass up such nice slash. And, what about that bevvy of Albany slash! Good pussy? Gotten into them yet? Don't wait, man! Have at it now!"
Clearly, this scandal of the decade now throws a monkey wrench into the Obama-Clinton name calling game, but Hillary barked back, anyway. "As your first female President, I will not allow outside blowjobs. No one breeches my britches, ya her! So, you male pigs and the Lesbos I know on the Hill, and there are many wanting to sniff at my sweet spot, go home and jerk off!"
Response from Obama later started off with more mud slinging. "I, in fact, saw someone, a well-known Hollywood 'boy toy' under Hillary's dress last week and it was a tight fit, man! Maybe, he was a late voter looking for a crack at the ballot 'box' to cast his vote. However, where I come from, it doesn't take any 25 minutes to vote, followed by a fancy restaurant-style hot-towel cleanup on a red face, sweating, and hair stuck in my teeth. Man, I'm gonna have fun with this one! Watch out Ms. Clinton!"
