Mosquito In Sink Was Already Dead

Written by Monkey Woods

Thursday, 16 May 2019

image for Mosquito In Sink Was Already Dead
A mosquito that's still very much alive

A man who went to wash his hands in a wash basin was surprised to find a mosquito, apparently sleeping but, on closer inspection, the malaria-spreading killer creature turned out to have expired.

Moys Kenwood, 55, was rinsing his hands to rid them of any stray traces of urine, after having a slash at his workplace, when he spotted the 'angel of death'. He took a microsecond to decide to kill it. When it did not move from its resting place on the white ceramic slope of the basin, however, he gave it a poke with his finger: it was already dead!

Not used to seeing dead mosquitoes in an unsplattered state, Kenwood ruminated on how it might have met its end.

This was not a road accident; nor was it a violent attack, or even a robbery gone wrong; a heart attack seemed unlikely, and heat exhaustion unheard of.

Could it be that the mosquito had died of natural causes in old age?

Had it - as it might very well have done - just got fed up, and lost the will to live?

Had it been the unfortunate victim of foul play?

Who knew? Or cared? Kenwood turned the tap on, and washed the horrible bastard down the plughole, along with the piss from his fingertips.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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