Written by Jaggedone

Sunday, 20 January 2019

image for Short-sighted alpaca gets special deal from French Specsavers!
"Now where's my f'ing half blind alpaca?" You know now Senor!

Brittany, France: After being forcefully exported from the mountain ranges of Peru to France, a disorientated, short-sighted alpaca decided it was time to find out where the hell it really was.

Lost and wandering through a tiny Brittany village, it saw, in the distance, a Specsaver sign. Not being able to read French, but seeing a pair of specs hanging outside, it bee-lined for the shop.

France, a nation of Napoleon non-shopkeepers, and a country that welcomes strangers, is open to weird figures entering its establishments. The alpaca entered the store and immediately crashed into a glass cabinet full of Ray Bans. The owner of Specsavers realised the thing was half-blind, and ordered his staff to make a pair of designer glasses for it.

After fitting the glasses, Specsavers called a local zoo, asking if it would be possible to adopt the thing. The alpaca, now being able to see, thanked the store owner with a friendly spit, as he was led away by a friendly zookeeper.

Happily, the alpaca with specs is now wowing audiences in the zoo, with spec-tacular tricks, and can stand on his head blindfolded!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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