Krasnaya Polyana, Sochi: Vladimir Putin's Olympic crown jewel hopes just went adown the pan as a NATO weather forecast for 7-24 February predicts blistering temperatures to melt Russia's mighty winter sports complex erection.
The Black Sea resort has seen $50billion of designer snow heaped on its landscape despite Kremlin seismology reports of a 'huge' subterranean geyser that's ready to burst around Valentine's Day.
Now meterology forecasts from the International Space Station go even money on unseasonal heat hitting the Russian Olympic resort after a sudden magnetic solar pole reversal sent tropical weather northwards from the Old Fertile Crescent.
Commenting on the impending disaster NATO spokesperson Sir Month DamBusta, VC and Bah! Humbug, said Vladimir Putin had reached the very end of a slippery slope after decades of off-piste shambles taunting the Organization.
The Men's Downhill Tobogganing Pentathlon will now be rescheduled to a resort in Aspen.
