Canada Picks New Leader, Nobody Cares

Funny story written by Steve Shaw

Tuesday, 18 November 2003

TORONTO-Paul Martin, the new chosen leader of Canada's Liberal party is set to take the place of Canada's old Prime Minister Jean Chretien and the world has expressed it's strong opinion-nobody cares.

"Canada has a prime minister? The kind that leads a country?" said U.S. Secretary of State Colin Powell upon hearing the news. "So…they don't just do whatever we tell them?"

Indeed the news that Canada had some sort of leadership, no matter how ineffective or inactive, did shock many around the world, but the general reaction was all the same. "I honestly just don't give a damn," said Jack Heath of Manchester, England. "I found out about three or four months ago that Canada even existed. Why should I care about their leadership?"

"It's not really so much that we don't care about Canada," said New York Times' Editor Andrew Bennigan, "but who wants to read about them when there are so many more exciting stories happening in international news right now? Did you know a fourteen pound alien baby was born in Stockholm yesterday? With international headlines like that, Canada will just have to play second fiddle for now."

"Canada picks new leader in waiting,"-BBC News, 15 November 2003

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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