Peru drug mule stooges 'home for Christmas 2033'

Written by queen mudder

Monday, 30 September 2013

image for Peru drug mule stooges 'home for Christmas 2033'
Hard-partying gals such as these two can expect a reduced custodial sentence

Lima - Two daft Brit cows caught with one-and-a-half kilos of Colombian cocaine have changed their pitch and admitted trafficking following a Peruvian Justice Ministry plea bargain sweetener.

This offers a reduced terms sentence in exchange for grassing up the ID of drug-running kingpins accused of masterminding the Peruvian leg of a global smuggling racket.

Lima prosecution sources have hinted heavily this means the women 'could be out of jail by Christmas 2033'.

The reduced sentence option would shave a good 20 years from the expected penal tariff under the country's draconian anti-drug laws.

Melissa Reid and Michaella McCollum were caught at Lima Airport in August this year and claimed to be innocent victims of a coercion plot that hired them on the European holiday isle of Ibiza.

This morning a spokesperson for their legal defense team said he was hopeful the young women would make a full disclosure to finger the Mr Bigs who'd hired them.

A gram of Bogota Brainbuster retails at around $100.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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