Study: 92% of babysitters hired by moms are butt-ugly

Funny story written by Lyndon

Wednesday, 24 August 2011

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Dubee reports that calls to babysit have dropped off lately

HARFOLD, VT--A study conducted by Harfold State College on Harfold dads (16 of them at Riverside Bar & Grill) shows that the vast majority of babysitters found by their childrens' mothers are not pleasant to look at.

More than nine out of 10 babysitters or 92% of those hired by moms only were deemed to have facial and body qualities that were less than desirable in the opinions of the dads.

Several theories were thrown about as to why this was the case, but one theory seems to be pretty much fact because all 16 dads said it was true: moms don't want dads driving hot girls home after their babysitting duties have been completed.

In a separate study conducted on Harfold moms (16 of them at a recent Scrapbooking party), 100% of the moms felt that the rides home took 25% longer when dads were driving the hot girls home as compared to the driving time when dads were taking ugly girls home.

Said Mary Dessered: "What's to be gained by driving an ugly girl home? They do it as quickly as possible just to be done with it."

The one exception agreed upon by 15 of the 16 moms or 93.8% dealt with 19-year-old Sonja Dubee. Although not that pretty, most moms thought that her body was such that in a dark car ride home, a dad could put a mental bag over her head and just focus on other aspects.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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