Cruise Ship Barack Obama Hits Iceberg

Funny story written by Philbert of Macadamia

Sunday, 24 July 2011

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Cruise Ship Barack Obama

Halifax Nova Scotia: The Canadian government is reporting that the Cruise Ship Barack Obama struck an iceberg on 15 July 2011 while sailing about 400 miles (640 km) south of the Grand Banks of Newfoundland on the way to the UK. No loss of life was reported, but the ship is a total loss.

Ironically the RMS Titanic had a similar encounter off of Newfoundland on 15 April 1912, almost one hundred years ago. However, experienced US and Canadian mariners do not understand icebergs being present in these waters during July.

The Barack Obama's design and construction (union built) featured luxury, opulence and windmill power. It was the first of the Stimulus Class cruise ships, costing upwards of $840 billion each. The ship's keel was laid down in 2009, as a shovel ready project employing lots of American workers to dig the dry dock and dredge the harbor.

The Ship's maiden voyage passenger manifest was limited to only a hand full of selected Democratic Executive Branch high ranking officials. No Republicans were invited.

Captain N. Pelosi was radioed by the Chief Lookout H. Reid that an iceberg was on the ship's port (left) side and she immediately ordered the helmsman to go hard-to port (old instincts die hard). The ship smashed into the iceberg at full speed. H. Reid later recounted that the iceberg appeared to be a semi-submersible Gulf of Mexico oil drilling platform covered by a very big white tarpaulin.

Canadian and US Navy ships arrived on the scene soon after the distress call was received on-shore via ship's satellite communications. The arriving rescue ships found the Barack Obama still afloat, but slowly sinking, with all the guests in life jackets on the Promenade deck ready to be disembarked. A money saving measure proposed by J. Biden eliminated any lifeboats being on board.

A light buffet lunch from Michelle's vegetable garden was being served as Rap Artist Common entertained the assembled passengers singing about violence against police. EPA environmentalists made sure no one jumped into the ocean to pollute the water.

Republican House Speaker Boehner, after learning everyone was safely evacuated to Halifax, called for a US House Committee investigation into this colossal waste of US taxpayer's money. Congressional Democrats charged that Republicans were sabotaging President Obama's grand idea to revitalize the USA's ship building industry.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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