New Untallied Ballots for Kloppenburg in Wisconsin Supreme Court Contest

Funny story written by rkcaughman

Friday, 8 April 2011

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The "culprit" in the untallied votes

In a stunning development, vote tabulators in Dane and Milwaukee Counties found 10,741 more untallied votes for Wisconsin Democratic candidate JoAnne Kloppenburg and 2,212 more untallied votes for Republican candidate and incumbent David Prosser.

This incredible announcement now provides Kloppenburg with some 1,000 more votes that Prosser.

The missing untallied ballots were not tabulated because an antiquated adding machine ran out of adding machine paper and the votes were as officials put it "Just not put down in ink."

To make matters worse the actual ballots themselves were accidentally placed in the back seat of a 1983 Ford Pinto, and may not have been counted at all.

This breaking news was delivered today from a joint press conference in the cities of Madison and Milwaukee and announced by vote tabulators Prudence Samuelson of Madison and Constance Walker from Milwaukee, both county clerks in their respective counties.

More explanation is forthcoming at a 6:00 pm follow up press conference.

It is also reported that in Waukesha County, within the city of Brookfield, an additional 4000 new untallied votes have been located there for Prosser and in Bayfield County an additional 4001 new untallied votes for Kloppenburg have been located.

Both sides have pledged to continued to look for previously untallied votes until every untallied vote is located and retabulated.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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