Indiana man tired of comparing everyone to Hitler

Written by Jeff Brone

Tuesday, 22 March 2011

Indiana resident Karl Somtan has assured his friends he is through comparing anything he doesn't like to Hitler. He made that statement at a recent gathering at TGI Fridays last Thursday night, right after he compared a ref in a college basketball tournament game to Hitler for calling a two shot foul on a Ohio State player.

"Yeah, I guess it got a little out of hand" admitted Somtan. "First I compared Hitler to George Bush, then President Obama, I guess maybe because lots of people were doing it" he explained and added "then I got to the Governor of Wisconsin, then some of the union leaders there. I guess that one didn't really make much sense. Last week I almost compared the Three Stooges' "Moe" to Hitler and I knew it was time to stop. It wasn't even the one where Moe played Hitler, so I'm not sure what I was thinking."

Somtan has a history of extreme comparisons. His friends remember the time he kept comparing everything to "The Great Potato Famine," even when their favorite Chili's restaurant ran out of blue cheese dressing. Somtan explained that "it was a really bad time to run out of dressing, but probably not truly catastrophic."

Somtan also agreed to stop comparing anyone to any evil dictators, except King Leopold II to Hitler, because "I think it's historically accurate so it's OK to use Hitler in that one."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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