Shriner Clown Wearing Too Many Bright Colors Killed by Hummingbirds

Written by Bureau

Friday, 4 March 2011

image for Shriner Clown Wearing Too Many Bright Colors Killed by Hummingbirds
Darrell, taken just before he got into clown car.

Grand Poobah Darrell Henderson of Little Rock, Arkansas was participating in a "Spring Is Coming" parade by driving his little clown car in a parade that included Miss Rutabaga of 2011 Wednesday when disaster hit.

"I don't know why Henderson chose those particular colors for the parade. Probably wanted his kids to know which clown was him, but those birds sure were drawn to him", stated Elmer Goodlick, who is also a Shriner clown.

One lady in the audience stated that she had missed the whole hummingbird episode because Henderson's clown gear had brought on a "Herrible Sick Headache some people call a Migrant", but that she heard the audience gasping suddenly and many running feet coming to Henderson's aid.

However, it was too late.

"He looked like a mummy after hundreds of hummingbirds covered him and sucked out all his vitals" was the story most heard.

"It's just like those ten thousand peckerwoods that fell out of the sky in that foreign place over the waters", stated Clemmie Puckers. "It's all a sign, I tell you."

"I never put any feeders out for those little devils", stated Alice Bluefort. "No one in town wanted them around because they'd buzz around your head ever time you was sitting around outside peeling maters for canning."

"Then again...if we HAD some out for thar drinking on thar way north, maybe Henderson wouldn't have had his fluids drained out of him. I wonder if Darrell's wife..widow would let us keep him to draw crowds to the Fall Festival this year. It would pay for his funeral."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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