Ground Zero, the site of the September 11, 2001 terrorist attack in New York City, is hallowed ground, say some of the most morally repellent humans in America. Taking a break from reprehensible, and sometimes criminal, proclivities these Americans say that building a Muslim mosque near ground zero is a sacrilege.
The controversy surrounds a proposed Islamic community center to be located within two blocks of ground zero. Many believe the proximity of a Muslim place of worship to the site of the terrorist act committed by Muslims is an offense to the sacred memory of those who died that day. One of those is Tiffany, an exotic dancer employed by the Pussycat Lounge located three blocks from ground zero. "These Muslims should take their mosque somewhere else," Tiffany said during her cigarette break, just moments after thrusting her exposed vagina to within inches of a drunken patron's face. "This is a sacrilege!"
Famous reprobates are also calling for the mosque to be moved. Former congressman and serial adulterer Newt Gingrich insists that the mosque is part of a plot to bring Muslim rule to America. "This mosque must be stopped! How dare they besmirch this holy place!" exclaimed the thrice-married satyr who once had his cancer-stricken wife served with divorce papers at her hospital bed.
Arizona senator John McCain weighed in as well, "This mosque will besmirch the memories of the thousands who died when those planes were flown into those towers." McCain spoke with special knowledge of airborne terror, having spent the year 1965 bombing North Vietnam and killing thousands of non-combatant elderly, women, children and infants.
Not to be outdone, Senate Majority leader, Democrat and moral coward Harry Reid also said the mosque shouldn't be built near ground zero. "Don't build it there," he simpered. "Build it somewhere far enough away that I don't have to take a courageous and unpopular stand for religious freedom and the values that make America great. This is an election year, you know."
Some Republicans contacted for this article didn't respond saying they were too busy voting against allocating money to pay for healthcare for the ground zero responders whose health was damaged during the rescue and cleanup effort in the days following September 11.
