Republicans Hate Most Americans

Written by manbrad

Tuesday, 17 August 2010

The Republican party, in it's effort to improve its chances of taking back both houses of congress in 2010 and the White House in 2012, has stepped up its attacks on most of America's 308 million people. GOP candidates and elected officials have relentlessly attacked Democrats and liberals for years but have widened their net to take in women, immigrants and anyone who isn't white, male, Christian and poorly educated.

A breakdown of who Republicans have been attacking recently and their place in America follows:
The unemployed make up 9.6%
Foreign born persons 11.1%
Muslims 2%
Blacks 12.9%
Hispanics 15.8%
Women 50.7%
Democrats 35%
The elderly 12.9%
College graduates 24.4%
Illegal immigrants 4%
Surprisingly left out of the GOP's verbal pogrom are Asians at 4.6%.

Until recently, Republican strategies of division have been delivered cynically and the feelings of anger engendered by them dissipated quickly after elections. But this time the hatred seems sincere. From Newt Gingrich's personal attacks on an actual unemployed man to Louie Gohmert's undignified performance on CNN where he ranted incoherently about "terror babies" Americans are feeling the hate.

It seems few people within the boundaries of the United States meet the Republican criterion of "real American." Ronald Domestes, President of Americans for Sanity, said, "Statistically speaking, Republican chances of electoral success are slim using their current strategy. There aren't that many rednecks in America."

Karl Rove, mastermind of the most vicious political campaigns in US history, is well known for winning elections using hot button emotional issues and exploiting the fears of certain subsections of American society. Rove said, "America is running low on rednecks. But what there are a lot of are women who had domineering, hateful fathers. They're attracted to anyone who reminds them of these men and will do anything in a vain attempt to please them. Our research shows that there are plenty of them. Throw in some bitter, self-hating losers desperately seeking approval from among the groups we attack and they'll deliver us congress this year and the White House in 2012. It's true you Democrats, nice guys finish last. And in more ways than one."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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