Susan Boyle red scarf wearing fanatical loonies have been forced to call in an exorcist, after apparently being possessed by an influx of purple scarves. The scarves, which they allege can breathe fire, have been declared as evil by the fanatics.
"These purple scarves are all over the place," moaned a fanatic. "They're pure evil. They keep trying to wipe out our indigenous red scarves."
"We know it was these evil purple scarves that hacked in and stole all our blessings!" rambled another fanatic.
"Well I saw one breathing fire yesterday! I swear to 'papa' God!" said some old dear with her ear trumpet.
The fanatics were forced to call in the exorcist when endless praying didn't work.
"We prayed to 'papa' God for hours, but we never had any response. The evil purple ones kept on coming to destroy us all," said a chief fanatic.
"Oh, not those lot again!" grumbled God. "I've been ignoring them for days now. Something about purple scarves? Well, I wear a purple scarf myself! And stop calling me 'papa' God!"
The exorcist, who the fanatics found through an ad at the back of 'Praying Monthly' magazine, said "Not bad, $300 for a bottle of 'holy' water and a bit of chanting!"
"Oh, that's much better!" said a fanatic. "All the purple scarves have been banished! We can now get back to endless praying, name calling, and chasing after Susan wherever she goes!"
