Known to be suffering from depression for many years, Tipper Gore, who is now separated from Al Gore, says that it must have been being married to Al for all those years.
"I can't believe how good I feel", she told a friend yesterday.
"Can I sell that story to a tabloid?", asked the friend.
"You know, I no longer give a poo-poo!"
Gore stated that having to spend 40-plus years with Mr. Happy himself must have been the root cause of all her depression.
"Can you imagine waking up every morning and that flat robotic voice is already talking about the environment, the 2000 election loss, his next book about something else that's depressing?"
"And he would be telling it to the cat, until he noticed that I was awake!"
According to her secretary, Tipper is ready to write a book on "How To Really Kiss Depression Good-Bye!"
"She then told me to get her Oprah's telephone number. That lady is ready to bloom!"
