Many Wealthy Elderly Tourists Headed For The Gulf Coast For Cures

Funny story written by Bureau

Monday, 24 May 2010


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"Signs Across Gulf: Elderly Crossings"

What has thus far been a total disaster for hotels and businesses around the Gulf of Mexico over the oil spill, may not be so bad after all.

"We read in TheSpoof that everyone here had the shits, over the oil slick mixing into the water supply", stated one old turd. "I haven't had a good old fashioned shit in years, so me and the old lady decided to come here to "Test the Waters" as they said back in our day."

Thousands of old couples continue to arrive from Panama Beach to Buluxi, Mississippi, as word spreads.

Another little old lady stated that her dear grandmother used to "Test The Waters" in French Lick, Indiana.

"The family would take their own rail car and have it unhitched and stay there for months. The springs smelled like rotten eggs. Still does. The people would drink something called 'Pluto Water' and run for the bathroom."

"Of course, years later we learned that the mineral waters had lithium in it so that made everybody feel better. Granny stated that everyone would be placed in four groups according to the disease they had. Then each group would be sent to Minerial Springs #1, #3, #5, and #7 for treatment. Turns out that there were only 4 but they had named them #1,3,5,and 7 to make it appear that there were more. Also, all four came from the same Spring."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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