Weather Channel Deploys Jim Cantore to Cover Impending Cape Cod Tsunami Set to Swamp Obama & Dems!

Funny story written by Morse

Monday, 18 January 2010


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White Sharks Gather off Cape Cod waiting for Tuesday Election Results!

Democrat Politicians have been bracing for a monumental voter storm as Hair Apparent Martha Coakley, the Kennedy' Anointed One' for his very large Senate Seat has been responsible for calling up monumental storm clouds for the future of Obamamania.

Latest indication that Martha, who one Kennedy Spawn keeps calling 'Marcia' in front of news cameras, is about to drown in a mire of missteps, is the arrival of "The Master of Disaster", Weather Channel Undertaker, Jim Cantore.

"It's like looking out your window and seeing the Grim Reaper," said one grizzled Cape Codder, " if they sent Jim here, you know that a mess of shit is sure going to follow!"

Cantore, appearing on the dunes in Provincetown in his signature hooded Weather Channel attire, looked grim, despite also looking dazed, confused, and slightly feminine, but not in a gay way.

Clutching the mike in a death grip, Cantore announced to his audience that he wasn't quite sure why he was there, but pointing to the calm cape waters, he intoned,' Hard to believe, that within 24 hours the political waters of Cape Cod could be turned into a horrific Tsunami set to storm ashore and wipe out a century of Democratic rule here on this picturesque outcropping of land!"

Thousands of hearty Capers turned out to toast Cantore handing out 'Cape Codders', a mixture of Vodka and cranberry juice, to toast the amazing rise of Scott Brown, who only a few short weeks ago was 30 points behind Coakley in the polls...a margin never before overcome in a political contest.

Dem voters outnumber Republicans by 3-1 in the Bay State, but analysts predict that an overwhelming majority of 'Independents' will tip the scales toward Brown, and event which will be bigger than the devastation in Haiti for the Obama Chicago Political Machine, who assumed the election was 'in the bag.'

At stake for the Dems; a majority in the senate in order to push through all their socialist and costly entitlement programs. If Brown wins, Obama will be forced to go through the motions until the 2010 November elections, the results of which according to experts, Obama will be forced to just 'take a vacation' until his term is up...either in 2012 or 2016.

Dem strategists are already seeing defeat, and have started blaming George Bush for the Coakley failure! It seems George is just everywhere, F*****g things up for Barry and his Band!

Also appearing on site, camera ready, is National Geographic on hearing a pod of Great White Sharks have assembled under the Bourne and Sagamore Bridges leading to the Cape. The last such occurrence was prior to the death of Teddy Kennedy when rumors were flying that the walking Gin Gimlet was going to be buried at sea.

According to one marine biologist at famous Wood's Hole Institute, the sharks have a canny knack in determining the location of natural disasters. Boston columnists have predicted for weeks that Coakley's Campaign is about to drive off a bridge anticipation of the event thousands of cheering taxpayers have already added to the usual 21 mile backup over the bridges in a party atmosphere and tailgating merriment!.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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