The White House announced today that President Obama has received the Auto Czar Award. White House Press Secretary, Robert Gibbs says the "President is honored to receive this award and truly hopes he can continue to live up to controlling the auto industry, even if he isn't very versed in the industry itself."
After the President took his morning walk today with Michelle and kids in tow to discuss why he couldn't get any of that Wall Street bonus money, he decided to re-focus on the auto industry.
"There are simply too many domestic car dealerships in the US," the Auto Czar said in a press conference following Robert Gibb's statement to the press. "I mean look it, we need more Toyota and Subaru dealerships in the US. We need to be fair!"
US dealers protested outside the White House holding signs that said, "What about me Mr. Auto Czar?" and "My Dealership Is Closed! What Do I Do Now?" Most were shackled by police and taken from the mob leaving many Asians with happy smiles to cheer the Auto Czar on his success and ideas for the future of the auto industry.
After the press conference, the Auto Czar, with family in tow, squeezed into a Smart car whose claims that it can never crash due to the walnut shell principal and its Titanium Steel frame makes it really smart indeed. "Most pit bulls can crack a walnut shell with one bite," noted Press Secretary Robert Gibbs, "I'm scared for them right now."
Onlookers of different races, but not Americans, threw flowers at the Smart Car and the first family responded with waves and the President popped his Auto Czar trophy award up for all to see, only to have it flail into the crowd leaving a few injured.
"On to Detroit to set them straight," could be heard from the Auto Czar's lips as the Smart car disappeared into a crowd of modified Toyota black minivans.
