Written by Fela

Wednesday, 22 September 2004

John Kerry's bad economics suggested a stop to off-shoring jobs to countries like India, China etc, where companies gain from the labor cost arbitrage. Little did anyone knows that the Idea or the model he is building up comes from the economist of 'Hyper-Cheap-Labor Inc', a Israel-based BPO outfit, who lost all of their jobs coming from the US and UK to India. "Kerry's our only customer now, no one's outsourcing to us anymore", says their AVP - Client Relations.

"The Israelites are just trying to stop the work coming to us as they've lost it. They want a lost-lost situation but its not going to work", remarks Mr. Outshour Singh - CEO JustPlainCheapest Pvt Inc, India. "Israelites don't know kungfu but we do, they don't even have not-so-great wall, let alone Great wall", says the furious CEO of ChinaCheap Happy Ltd. Mr. Ouu TShoo RSung.

According to Nielsen figure, US gains 190 cent out of every dollar made by outsourcing and the rest 110 goes to India. Again, McKenzie worked out the number as 12 cent to India and the remaining 18 to US. "It's that good, for a nation who doesn't even know how many cents are there in a dollar", says the much sough after, Osama Bin Laden, at a press conference held in White House earlier last week.

"I normally skip lunch and get my job done with the lunch money in India, I got the job done by a more qualified person and lost 10 pounds at the same time!! It's really great," confessed an executive of US-based software major, "I utilize the rest of my day supporting Bush and fight against Kerry and his bad economics".

The question, which arises, is not about the continuity of outsourcing, and also not how much it will affect the on-going election rally. The major concern is to what degree will Kerry keep on outsourcing? We received a report that after a busy campaign that Mrs. Kerry isn't all that happy and satisfied. "We will readily accept the job," says Well Hung Lee of ChinaCheap Happy Ltd., who is handling 76 US clients at present including Madonna, Cher and George Michael.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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