Senate democrats celebrated the passage of a poorly conceived crappy health care bill today. Senator Harry Reid, the spunky sparkplug senate majority leader, hailed the passage as a "purely political move that we short sighted nimrods can celebrate into the holiday season. The American people can be proud. I'm sure Ted Kennedy is somewhere smiling. Unless he's in hell."
Nancy Pelosi, the enthusiastic pepperpot speaker of the house, said she was proud that the passage of the bill "took up so much time and energy and will provide benefits of such questionable value. While we could have been working on so many issues involving the economy, education, housing or homeland security, we chose to pass a bill to try to make the president look good. This is why I became a public servant!"
Senate minority leader for the republicans said the bill was pushed through against the better judgment of the American people. He added "Thank God we never tried to do much about healthcare while we were in power!"
Erroll Nutley, an unemployed steel worker, said he celebrated the "slightly elevated chance he now had of getting a healthcare plan he might be able to afford a bit more easily" and Dr. Sanderson Stolls, a Nebraska hematologist, said he welcomed the landmark plan which "surely will only hurt doctors who rely on payments from Medicare for a substantial portion of their income, which thankfully is only most of us."
President Obama said "The audacity of hope, the clarity of dreams, the audacity of clarity, all these things came together today." and hailed the passage as "the type of change I knew we could enact: change that involves highly compromised ideas that were poorly thought out to begin with. This is proof that this country is moving in a direction."
