Social Networking website is Sued for Recognition of Same-Sex Marriages

Funny story written by Stuart Florwood

Friday, 20 November 2009


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Presidents Bush and Putin were listed as 'married' on their respective Mugnovel pages from 2004-06.

WASHINGTON, D.C.- Papers were filed today in Federal Court challenging one social networking website's recognition of marriages between two members of the same sex. The United Families Organization (UFO) made the formal complaint alleging that the site, Mugnovel, "fails to comply with state and federal law by permitting any two people to list their relationship status as 'married' when the law clearly states that marriage is a union between one man and one woman."

"Mugnovel, as well as all social networking websites, should comply with federal and state laws as they currently stand," Mark Burger, an attorney for UFO, stated earlier this morning, "by recognizing illegal unions, Mugnovel, regardless of its political intentions, is doing great harm to the social fabric on which the institution of marriage is tightly woven."

"Children and adolescents alike are being indoctrinated into the homosexual agenda every time they login and see their peers freely and unlawfully 'marrying' any person they want to. Frankly, it's un-American and should cease. The law must be properly enforced across the board, no exceptions." Burger added.

In a statement released shortly after the legal announcement was made, Mugnovel said "we resent the UFO's decision to pursue legal recourse to restrict how members of our community can define their relationships with each other, be it intimate, familial, friendly, or even 'complicated.' We believe our members have the freedom to express their relationships any way they choose to, despite what laws may say."

"Besides, 'married' is just a word anyway."

When asked for a response, Burger replied "we would drop legal action if there was a separate label for homosexual partners, like 'is domesticated with' or 'life-long butt buddies or scissor sisters' respectfully. It simply is illegal to call it 'marriage.'"

In an unscientific poll, 96% of respondents sided with Mugnovel whereas the last four percent were "completely out of their minds."

The first court hearing has been scheduled for early next year.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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