HarperCollins estimates 1 out of 200 U.S. citizens are idiots

Funny story written by Alexandria177

Tuesday, 27 October 2009

image for HarperCollins estimates 1 out of 200 U.S. citizens are idiots
Miss Gold Rush of Wasilla, Alaska, 1986

New York City, New York - At HarperCollins, researchers have shown that the proportion of idiots to Americans is approximately 1 out of 200. Therefore, they are getting ready to release 1.5 million hardcover editions of "Going Rogue" by *ahem* Sara Palin.

Critics of American intelligence point out several stunning facts. One, to assume Sara, the woman who can see Russia from her porch, wrote it is quite a stretch. Two, the book costs $29 or so, and the e-book is coming out a bit over a month later, so what dip buys it in November? Three, and most damning, who the hell is Sara Palin?

Yes, increasingly, the fuss is not about what Sara Palin plans, but who she is and why we care. This is a woman who's major claim to fame was getting about 115,000 out of 500,000 people to vote for her to be governor of one of the least populous states we have. And who couldn't even stay the course on that job.

Her other claims to fame involve being Mayor of a town you've not heard of, and having been the VP candidate for a guy who knew he wasn't going to win from the start.

As a former beauty queen for some cow town, and with a family that has Jerry Springer drooling, one can best describe Sara as a "Reality Show" waiting to happen, if she's not just gone ahead with it and saved filming expense by having the media do it for free.

Yet in spite of all of this, a major publishing house is confident that of the next 200 people you see, one of them will be dumb enough to buy the book the moment it is released. True, Harpers disavows that there are 1.5 million idiots out there. In fact, they insist that there are many more idiots out there, but as one industry insider said, "That's why we have paperback versions." 1.5 million just represents the elect, or what Harpers calls the "blithering idiot" segment.

Taking no chances, they are having Oprah pimp the book, as it's been long known that her market is that segment.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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