In a startling revelation, online satirical rag "The Spoof" today announced that articles that mention "breasts, "boobs," "mammos," "hooters, "melons," "tatas," "fun bags," "gazongas," "bazongas," "congas," "jugs," "hefties," "nose cones," "pontoons, "dueling banjos," "yabbos" or "the pointer sisters" receive publication precedence over articles that make no mention of tits.
"Tits have played a seminal role - sometimes literally - in our country's history," said William Randolph Spoof III, publisher. "Why, just think of the USA without the pointers of Marilyn Monroe and Jane Russell, the ginormous lungs of Jayne Mansfield, the saggy pancakes of Mae West, the strange nipple adornment of Janet Jackson and of course, the helium-chested Pamela Anderson."
"Sue us - we just love titties," Spoof concluded.
