Boston - (Nepotism Mess): That's it, signed, sealed, delivered and a done deal.
The next US Senator from Massachusetts will be chosen on 27 February 2010 when Chelsea Clinton turns 30.
"That will make her the youngest woman ever to become Senator," LA FagHagSlagMag's political editor said today, "kinda fitting considering Ted too was only 30 when he took over from seatwarmer Benjamin Atwood Smith II!"
Clinton has long been groomed for the position by her illustrious Global Piss Process illuminati parents Bill & Hill.
Her academic qualifications include a 2001 Stanford University graduation thesis on Tony Blair's KGB/Mossad Fraudsters' Handbook a.k.a. the 1998 IRA Good Friday Agreement.
This treaty was spawned with the help of Senator Kennedy's tequila-induced halluncinations.
It skillfully erased all reference to the Provos' Asian branch's plans to bomb the World Trade Center on 9/11, blaming some beardie opium peddlers in the Tora Bora outback.
Some reckon shagging Babyshambles singer Pete Doherty during her subsequent postgrad at Oxford University completely addled an already coke-addicted brain.
Caroline Kennedy is due for a facelift.
