The State Legislature of the State of Tennessee will vote today on whether or not to lower the age of consent. That age is currently 16, but lawmakers and lobbyists are attempting to lower it to the age of 12.
Dylan "Bubba" Edwards, a member of the legislature from Tick Holler, said that "we done found out that the age is 13 in Arkansas, Louisiana, and Mississippi. We can't let them fellers beat us on this. Our girls are better'n theirs anyway, and I knows that from experience."
The motto for the supporters of the bill is "if they're old enough to bleed, they're old enough to bleed." Opponents, however, still say "15 should get you 20."
The state's Board of Education will now move the teaching of sex education from the high school to the elementary school level. Said board member, Ed Earl Bates, "we darn well better start teaching our girls at age eleven from now on, cuz they gonna have to learn these things. I plan on taking these matters into my own hands, if'n you know what I mean."
One state Senator, 41 year old Elvira Bleeb, was unavailable for comment as she was home babysitting her great grandchildren while their mother was out school shopping for her first day in the 8th grade.
